Archive for December, 2012


Recently I began a devotional called “Made to Crave” by Lysa TerKeurst, which is about “Satisfying your deepest desire with God, not food”.  As I read through the first several days of this daily devotional, my heart was stirred. I recognized that I have cravings within my flesh that are distracting me from satisfying my deepest desires with God and some days that even includes food. God has been showing me how several things in my life are distracting me from my relationship with Him.


I thought that after Dad died in June, and Blane moved off to college two weeks later and I got “settled” back into a routine, that my relationship with Christ would flourish. Much to my dismay I have struggled greatly in the last few months in my relationship with the Lord.


This journey that I have been on for these few months is one that I have never encountered before. God has brought me painfully face to face with myself and I had to make a decision about the direction I would turn. I could choose to run in fear from God, afraid of what else He might allow, due to me committing to offer Him continually an open hand in those months leading up to Dad’s death, OR I could choose to allow Him to work in my heart, see Him refresh me and deepen my trust in Him…even in the face of my fears.


My choice has not been a sudden turn. It has been more of a gradual movement over the last few weeks. I can see now that God has allowed me to really take time as I turned to Him. Perhaps in the slow turn, my relationship with Him would be stronger, more confident, with longer lasting effects. I can also say that the turn is still happening. I know the direction that I intend to move…toward a deeper trust with God, but I also know that I am still in process. I can attest that although I desire to grow in the Lord daily, Satan is working to distract me through temptations and other ploys. I pray that somehow if there are others of you struggling, that my testimony will encourage you to keep on striving to know God more. Trust Him deeper. Live for Him stronger than you have ever lived for Him before. I am working toward the same.


{Joy Dare} Gifts from today:

~Christmas lights early in the morning

~laughing and hearing more stories about my dad

~unexpected money

~towels hot out of the dryer

~seeing pictures of an injured owl that my husband rescued

~left overs (these are always a gift)

~having hands and feet that enable me to work

~writing again


~memories of how I have been blessed

~hair clips




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